Third Party Intervention

Third Party Intervention : Conflict Management In Islam Mohd Fuad Mohd Salleh, PhD. Faculty of Business Universiti Selangor. The role of third party in conflict resolution has never been refuted. Though conflict can be resolved by those in conflict, often there is a need for a third party intervention. The qualitative case study was used to uncover the effectiveness of Sulh in resolving conflict. The research findings suggested two main criteria for the basis of conflict resolution in Malay married couples: (1) inline with syariah and laws, and (2) mutual agreement.

This study also found that in handling sulh negotiation, respondents had used cocus and empowerment as the methods to resolve conflicts. As mediators in the sulh process sulh officers possessed behavioral skills, nevertheless they lacked analogical reasoning skills. Sulh is effective because of it negotiating effectiveness conducted by the Sulh officers. The capability of Sulh officers to assist the conflicting party with religion as a guide in unbias manner show the effectiveness of Islamic knowledge and foundation in resolving conflicts.

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It implies that the western mediation theories are not all suitable in the Malay society. Mediation has to explore new deminsion that is to merge mediation and counseling. Mediation counseling can be introduced as new theory as an alternative dispute resolution (ADR) method to resolve conflict. Mediation counseling requires the mediator to play dual functions, as mediator in face to face negotiation and counselor in cocus sesion. Key word: Sulh, mediation, conflict management. Introduction Competetion among peoples cannot be avoided thus conflict is never ending.

Competetion exist because of interest, values, actions, status, objectives and other needs. Sometimes competetion is purposly created because of job specification needs (Bisno, 1988). But more importantly is with every problem, crisis, or conflict, there is a possiblity of success and failure. It is important to identify, nurture and harvest the success seeds as it is the responsibilities of the crisis management (Augustine, 2000). Conflict is natural, not positive and not negative, and it is an effect which cannot be avoided as a result of a natural process for change and development (Messman & Mikesell, 2000).

Conflict is a state where interests and objectives of two or more parties are incompetible (Klar, Bar-Tal and Kruglanski, 1988; Thomas, 1976; Schmidt dan Kochan, 1972; Pruitt dan Rubin, 1986; Putnam dan Poole, 1987, in Rhoades, 1999). Conflict is refered to as an existance of a clash between two different interests but cannot be shared (De Bono, 1985 dan Littlejohn, 1988). Social conflict is refered to as a social interaction process constitues a raection to acquire sources, power and status, believe and other interest with limited resources (Bisno, 1988).

Negative result in conflict is expected a if there is a party who deal with the conflict using win-lose tactic. Most people and managers had tried to solve problem, crisis or conflict by looking it from their own perspective and understanding without getting a third party opinion. This will result in incomplete and ineffective resolution and conflict will continu to exist (De Bono, 1985). Based on the need of a third party which is unbias, its present is needed to assist the conflicting party to manage the conflict.

There are several functions of third party. Part of it is the explorer, who gave assurance to the conflicting parties that winning is not the goal of the other party. Another role played by the third party is reconciler, who provides spaces for improvement. Other functions are unifier, facilitator, legitimator, counselor and mediator (Lederach, 1997). The most acceptable type of third party is mediation where an unbiased individual create a path for the conflicting parties to negotiate to resolve their conflict.

Conflict resolution through mediation can achieve higher satisfaction among the conflicting parties as compared to other type of third party (Severson, 1998). Mediation is a process where a third party will assist the conflicting parties to negotiate voluntarily to achieve a resolution. It is less costly compared to litigation (Roberts, 2002). Third Party Third party has been widely used in the Islamic community in Malaysia to handle family matters especially in marital dispute. They have played their role especially in resolving conflict including civil suit in Syariah Court (Osman, 1999).

Previous research showed that third party has played it roles to resolve conflict among Malays. Some of the examples of the third party are, Imam or religious leader, Ketua Kampung (Village Head) and the Penghulu (Village Chief) (Syed Hussin, 1977, and Yaacob, 1991). These peoples became the advisor in the Malay tradition to help in resolving conflict. Most of the time they became the third party that is referred to, for any problem or occasion in the village. In the extended family, each family was not only depending on their close family, thus all of them were also considered as family (Yaacob, 1991).

The implementation of Syariah Enactment as well as Islamic Family Law since 1880 then amended in 1885 did not isolate the role of those parties in any family matters (Ahmad Ibrahim, 1987 and Osman, 1999). Only after the implementation of Islamic Administration Enactment, the role of third party had shifted from those mentioned earlier to the Religious Officer appointed by the government. Skills A degree in Islamic Law is a basic requirement to become a Religious Officer. Communication skills, understanding human and the surrounding environment are other skills needed to become a third party in conflict resolution through negotiation.

To assist a conflicting party to make decision it is important for the negotiator to understand people. These skills were obtained from courses attended and through experienced handling the conflict. This study is intended to uncover and understand the skills needed by the Religious Officer in handling conflict between Muslim husband and wife. To handle conflict constructively, the party involved needs to combined effort and conflict management skills (Johnson & Johnson, 2000). These efforts can only be successful if the negotiator understands the process and steps to be taken in managing conflict.

Thopson and Nadler (2000) had introduced two skills that are required to be a negotiator: (1) analogical reasoning, and (2) behavioral skills. 1) Analogical Reasoning The negotiator who is trying to resolve conflict needs to understand the action of the conflicting parties whether they accept or reject the idea of the other party. Gick dan Holyoak (1983) argued that the most effective method to resolve conflict is through analogical reasoning. This argument was proven by the study conducted on a group of students. Analogy is a process of mapping the solution for one problem to solution for another problem.

It is important to understand that solutions for the previous problems are useful and might be effectived by mapping it to solve the current problem. This concept is as the same as the skills to understand perspectives forwarded by Tjosvold (1998) which explained that those who wants to resolve conflict must be able to understand the situation and try to associate it with past experience. This is also inline with subsumption concept (Ausubel, 1963) which explained the association of basic information with thhe new one.

It is almost same as the theory of information processing introduced and expended by researchers like Gagne (1965), Taba (1966), Brunner, Goodnow & Austin (1967), Atkinson-Shiffrin (1971) dan Hashweh (1986) (in Esther Gnanamalar, 1998). The main issue brought forward by those researchers was how to conceptualize and internalize all concepts that were previously gathered and understand which explained the existance of relationship between the old and new information (Esther Gnanamalar, 1998). 2) Behavioral Skills

Innovative and effective planning capabilities are part of the important foundations to those who wants to resolve conflict. It is important to act effectively to invent general strategies that can be functioned to resolve conflict in various condition. Various strategies were determined to resolve conflict. Among them is built trust and share information which combined the personality, sociologist, and economist theories (Lewicki dan Wiethoff, 2000). Sharing information is a prove that all parties are ready to build a condusive situation continuously (Thopson and Nadler, 2000).

Second strategy is to ask questions which will gather informations when it is hard to build trust. These informations will lead to the understanding of isues which are so valuable to both parties, which choices will be left behind dan which will be agreed by all parties (Thopson and Nadler, 2000). The third strategy is prepare informations. This strategy is useful when the conflicting parties refused to answer questions. Most of the time, sharing information is an effective strategy because the party that was given an information is psychologically obliged to give back some information.

Negotiator who gave up some information normally will get back some. The goal of this strategy is to get enough information to maximize the negotiation result for all parties. This strategy is then followed by tabling multiple offer simultaniously. Based on the reaction of the conflicting parties towards the multiple offer the negotiator can then make a conclusion on what is the best solution to be taken in order to resove conflict (Thopson and Nadler, 2000). Mediation in Islam

Human live in the circulation of believe, religion and tradition. These three factors have a great impact on our lives especially when someone belief that there is an opportunity in them. History showed that the peoples of Polynesia, Rome, Greek, Hindu, Jew, Christian, Chinese and Islam who lived and bound by religion had used religion rules and custom to resolve any disagreement among them (Syed Khalid, 2002). For Muslims, religion is the foundation in all actions and solutions.

There are so many verses in the Qur’an (the Holy book of Islam) and the words of Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him – PBUH) stating about the importance of referring to the book and the teaching of Prophet Muhammad if there is any doubt in action and decision taken. Islam teaches its followers to cooperate in any action and decision as part of the ways to overcome any obstacle and prevent mistakes. While competition is a way to improve commitment and quality and accepted as a source of independent that become a tool to improve oneself, respect to your own self, and self satisfaction.

Based on this teaching, mediation is encouraged because it promotes cooperation, honesty, being fair, equal, and committed. It is also encouraged in Islam because it will overcome obstacle and can reduce mistakes. The role of third party to resolve conflict among Muslims couple has been acknowledged and was practiced since the life of Muhammad (PBUH). This is true as it is mentioned in Surah An-Nisa’ (Surah no. 4), verse 35, which means: “If both of you fear a breach between the twain (the man and his wife), appoint (two) arbitrators, one from his family and the other from her.

If they both wish for peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation. Indeed Allah is ever All-Knower, Well-Acquitted with all things. ” According to Zainuddin & Fachruddin (1987) and Musa (1999) the resolution means that if the dispute between husband and wife become too complex and it is hard to be resolved by themselves that can lead to divorce, both of them can appoint a third party among them to reconcile them and they are bound to the decision made by the third party. The third party will then work to resolve the conflict in order to harmonize the relationship between those two to avoid divorce.

HAMKA (1984) while clarifying this verse explain that the reconciler (the third party) can be appointed to help the couple and it is necessary to avoid the conflict being prolonged. The third party can be from the close family, the people of the village or the ruler which known as Hakam. He also explained that the negotiation can be conducted openly and witnessed by the close family or in closed session. Sayyid Qutb (1963) while clarifying the same verse noted that Islam uses this method (the reconcilor) when it is believed that if the dispute is not being resolved as soon as possible, the marriage cannot be saved.

So the third party can negotiate open heartedly without any hatred or prejudice and bias to find ways to resolve the conflict to reconcile the couple. Conflict Resolution in Islam Islam has laid a strong foundation to be followed in resolving any dispute (Ahmad Ibrahim, 1990). When a Muslim face a problem they should refer back to the Qur’an and the teaching of Prophet as stated in surah An-Nisa’, verse 59 which says: “O you who believe! Obey Allah and obey the Messenger (Muhammad PBUH) and those of you (Muslims) who are in authority. And) if you differ in anything amongst yourselves, refer it to Allah and His Messenger (PBUH), if you believe in Allah and the Last Day. That is better and suitable for final determination. ” (4:59) The word Muslims who are in authority here is referred to those who are in power and managing Muslims interest in a broader scope that is to lead the Muslim physically and spiritually. They are also known as Ahlul halli wal `aqdi which means those who are capable in solving and managing the Muslims affairs (Zainuddin & Fachruddin, 1987).

Sulh Officer Sulh Officer is a special name given to the post created in the Syariah Court. This officer is appointed by the Jabatan Kehakiman Syr`ie (Syariah Judicial Department) of Selangor to work in the Syari`ah Court to assist in resolving any dispute. They have to possess basic degree in Islamic Study and Diploma in Judicial Administration. It is clearly stated in the position justification that the Sulh Officer is responsible to assist the Registrar of the Syariah Court in handling dispute resolution.

They have to follow the method stated in conducting the counseling session and then preparing a report to be presented to the Judge. Sulh Sulh is an Arabic word means “the end of a dispute” while from the Islamic perspective it means ”a contract that with it a dispute is ended volutarily” (Nazzam and Qadri Basha, 1909 and Wahbah al-Zuhaili,1999). Based on understanding from the Islamic perspective, Sulh is a process whereby a disputing parties in the Syariah Court was called to meet and negotiate formally in what is known as guided negotiation.

This meeting was proposed by the court based on the procedures set forth in the Sulh Negotiation Manual and if both parties arrived to an agreement, the court will issue a declaration without full court proceedings (Selangor Syariah Court, 2001). The implementation of Sulh is vital in Islam because it has been mentioned in several places in the Qur’an. One of them them is in Surah al-Hujurat, verse 9, which says: “And if two groups among the believers is at war, make peace among them. It was also mentioned in the word of Muhammad (PBUH) that he used to say: “The peace (sulh) is encouraged between the Muslim, except sulh in prohibiting the allowed and allowing the prohibit matters. ” (Narrated by at-Tarmizi in Subul as-Salam). There are several claims allowed under the enactment that can be negotiated using Sulh: (1) claims on breach of contract to get married or engaged; (2) claims after divorce that are muta’ah (divorce gift) and ‘iddah (damage claim on divorced period); (3) arrears in emolument; (4) joint wealth, (5) unsettled dowry; (6) claims on the child expenses; and (7) hadanah (child custody).

For child custody endorsement can only be made by the Syari`ah High Court. Since its implementation, Sulh has contributed to out-court settlement of so many cases referred to the Syari`ah Court. In Selangor, from May to December 2002, 803 cases were referred to Sulh Officer, 492 cases (61. 7 percent) were solved, 235 cases (29. 26 percent) brought to the judge for hearing, and the balance of 76 cases (9. 46 percent) were still in the hand of Sulh Officer (Zohdi, 2003).

This is a proof of the effectiveness of Sulh in resolving dispute without going to formal court proceeding. Conflict resolution is a constructive settlement of a conflict that ease the conflicting parties to negotiate to an agreement. It is important to ask for a third party view in conflict resolution because of the need to understand conflict from different perspectives in order to avoid unsettled conflict. One of the effective approaches to resolve conflict, which involve third party, is mediation.

Mediation is a process where an unbiased third party create a path to negotiate and assist the conflicting parties to find alternatives of settlement and then assisting the parties to come to an agreement by negotiating on which alternative is the best to resolve the conflict. Since the Sulh that is implemented in Selangor has the mediation criteria and had showed a good result this study is mean to understand the process in order for it to be accepted and then implemented in other states in Malaysia.

The Sulh capability must be proven and the only way to prove it is through empirical study. It is important to understand the role of Sulh Officer in conducting the negotiation process in Sulh. Sulh Pillars Before sulh can be implemented and before any agreement becomes valid, there are four pre-requisites of sulh that must be fulfilled. (1) sighah (offer and acceptance), (2) the disputing or conflicting parties, (3) disputed matters, (4) an exchange to disputed object. All of these pre-requisite must be present to validate the sulh.

Besides the pre-requisites there are three conditions that must be met in implementing sulh: (1) condition regarding the agreed parties, (2) condition on items of the agreement to reconcile, and (3) condition on the conflicted rights (Sheikh Ghazali, 2000). Based on the pre-requisites and the condition, if both parties agree upon the sulh, it cannot be changed and heard for second times without consent from the plaintiff (Atras, 2005). (1)Sighah (Offer and acceptance), Both parties need to make an offer and acceptence to ends the dispute or conflict.

Acording to Islamic Law, the offer and acceptence is a proof voluntary will in an agreement and not because of dures or force (Yasin, 1978, dalam Raihanah, 2005). Eventhough voluntary is very subjective and hard to prove, Islamic scholars argued that offer and acceptence can be valid reason or proof of voluntary action. If the agreement is achieved through force or dures then the agreement is considered null and void. The offer and acceptence must be done simultaniuosly and no delayed is permitted because if there is a delay, the doubt is considered to exist.

The offer and acceptence become an important element in mediation to show that the desputing or conflicting parties has receive an offer and agree to it. This same element is also being practised in sulh. (2)The disputing parties Scholars from the Syafie and Maliki agreed that sulh agreement is a contract involving goods and services (Idris, 1983 and Raihanah, 2005). Thus the all agreed that the conditions governing sale and purchase are also accepted and used in sulh. To enable sulh agreement to be valid only those parties involved have the right to make an offer and acceptence.

In this context, only the plaintaif and defenden are acceptable in making an agreement. If any other party involved in making a decision to achieve to an agreement, the agreement will become null and void. (3)Disputed matters Disputed matters is limited to any object or physical things like money, house, land or night turns (for husband who has more than one wife) with condition that the person has full ownership or right and control over it (Idris, 1983 dan Raihanah, 2005).

The disputed right or things must be in the ownership of those disputing parties and both have to acknowledge it during the negotiation process. Only then the negotiation process can be proceed. If the sulh agreement involve the exchange of any wealth or right to use, it must be something that is permitted in Islam. This concept is also being implemented in mediation. (4)An exchange to disputed object As a complete religion that covers all aspect of human life, Islam permits the use of an exchange for the disputed objects during negotiation in sulh.

This is to maintain justice as a vital part in conflict resolution under Islamic law and value. The exchange can be done if it met three conditions: (i) it must be something permissible in Islam, (ii) the exchange must be own by either party, (iii) the exchange must be something that is acknowledged or agreed by both parties (Raihanah, 2005). These conditions is put forward to avoid unsatisfactory of either parties The Foundation of Sulh Resolution The first foundation is that the solution must not against Islamic teaching as mentioned earlier.

This is according to the verse that says any differ among the believers should be referred back to Allah and His Messenger. The agreement proposed must not against Islamic values and there is no solution that permits the unpermissible or unpermit the permissable because in Islam those permissable and unpermissable is very clear (El-Qardlawi, 1978 and Idris, 1983). The second foundation is mutual agreement of both parties. If both conflicting parties cannot cooperate and insist on their interest then agreement will not be achieved.

Raihanah (2005) in clarifying the mutual agreement had taken into consideration a proposal from `Ali Haydar in al-Ahkam al-`Adliyyah who quoted that sulh must be associated to the concept of mutual understanding and give and take because the `aqad (the saying of a contract) in general term will also include buy and sell, al-Rahn, ijarah, kafalah, hiwalah dan other sayings. This will clarify that the saying of the contract is perform voluntarily and not by force.

Al-Nazzam & Qadri Basha (1909 in Raihanah, 2005) had connected the theme mutual understanding with the definition of sulh as a sign of strengthening the statement that mutual understanding is very important for both parties. It means that both parties are compromising to reach the agreement and begin the negotiation process. It is also a sign that they will work together to find a solution to resolve the conflict which then open a path to reach for an agreement. Methodology

Qualitative methodology is most suitable to be used in a study that is conducted to understand a phenomenon where information about the phenomenon is very little known to others (Merriam, 1998). Therefore the qualitative methodology that focused more on the real meaning in the the real contact can fulfill the requirement to understand the phenomenon (Marohaini, 1998). Case study, one of the methods used in qualitative study, is able to draw a limit for scope, time, respondents, and place. Case study also open a possibility to deepend the study in the holistic manner.

Qualitative study is a narrative and explainantial and it will enable the researcher and the reader to understand the researched phenomenon from the respondents’ perspective (Van Manen, 1983; Miles & Huberman, 1984; Merriam, 1998; Bogdan & Biklen, 1998). Qualitative study is providing a multiple design in research conducted (ethnography, case study, phenomenology, and educational critics) with each design has its own strength and detail approach to understand a phenomenon that is being studied (Glesne & Peshkin, 1992). Tellis (1997) is in the ame opinion with Yin (1994) that case study is suitable to be used in empirical research to study a contemporary phenomenon in the scope and real life context. Stake (1995, in Tellis, 1997) argued that case study was designed to uncover in detail the respondents’ view through multiple source of data. Resercher, the research instrument in qualitative study, has the chance to use his knowledge and experience to evaluate, understand, and predict what is being studied in more meaningful manners. This is because, as human being, researcher has the ability to conduct empathic observation and evaluate incidents from the respondents’ perspectives.

Several steps had been taken to ensure this smoothness of this study and all of these steps ere interrelated. The steps include data gathering, saperation and filteration, data evaluation, main issues evaluation, comparison between data and main issues, and lastly is to make a conclusion. Data were gathered using interviews with respondents that were chosen using purposeful sampling because interview is the most method used in gathering data in qualitative study. Purposeful sampling enables the researcher to draw a criteria, basis, and standard when choosing the respondents.

This method is used with the assumption that this method opens an opportunity for the researcher to achieve a saturating point. While conducting the study researcher always alert that all procedures and rules must always be followed to ensure the validity and reliability of the result. This is important because a doubtful study is meaningless. Thus, researcher has to ansure the research standard in order to make the study reached some high validity standard and is reliable. Researcher must maintain the ethic and unbiasness because researcher was the only instrument to gather data in qualitative study.

Data Management Semi structured interview was used in data gathering process from five respondents and all data were recorded using a tape recorder. All the interviews were transcribed verbatimly to a written document that is readable as soon as the interviews ended This is to avoid any missing data resulted from carelesness or forgetful (Miles dan Huberman, 1994). The analysis process were started with the development of a categories by reading the trinscipt over and over. These categories were developed based on the objectives of the study. Transkript is a main data in any study using interview.

The transcipt were divided into three column where there is a column to add any additional information or clarification which were collected fom observation and field notes or any other documents. After trinscript were prepared, it then were analysed to find any connection between data to answer the research questions: (1) What are the main criteria of resolving conflict through mediation from the sulh perspectives, (2) How Sulh officer play their role as mediators to resolve conflict between husband and wife, (3) What are additional skills needed besides basic counseling skills in handling a conflict through mediation.

Data Category Data categorisation were done by sperating data put under several categories thet were developed from the data gathered. These categories were then used to develop themes. In a case study, data analysis was conducted during and after the data gathering process. The first stage was the detail understanding about the cases from different sources by acquiring as many as possible information from the respondents. This was done through continuosly reading the transcript of the first respondent over and over to get a broad picture of the research and understanding the data hat were gathered.

While reading the transcript, researcher underlined and marked the important ideas and phrases that had a potential to answer and explain the research questions. The phrases were then put together and then they were grouped into suitable category. This was done to ensure the ability of the data gathered to describe and explain the meaning from the respondents perspectives in the most perfect manner. The phrases were then put into a table with three column with each of them representing the research questions, categories, and the data that became a proof to the first two column.

Research Findings and Discussion The respondents interviwed were in the average age of 25 and 35 and had at least two years experienced as Sulh Officer. All of them had the same educational background that was Bachelor in Law or Islamic Law from local or abroad. Each of them had a Diploma in Judicial Administration whic is a pre-requisite to become Sulh Officer. This diploma offered only to those who hold a Bachelor in Law or Islamic Law. Data gathering is important in any research or study. A systematic data gathering will ease the evaluation and analysis process.

From the first respondent six themes were identified from the data gathered. The themes are: (1) obeying the rules and laws, (2) compromy, (3) focused on the future, (4) openness, (5) understanding the human, and (6) integration. The categories and themes were then used as a guide to collect data from other respondents in order to link all the data collected and strengthen the relation of the data collected previously. In general, Sulh that was implemented in Selangor did not differ from mediation that is practiced today in term of practice. But what differentiate the western mediation and Sulh is in the foundation.

The first difference is sulh considered and put the believe in religion as the important foundation in resolving any dispute which in contrast western mediation did not considered it as a basis in resolving conflict. In the Malay culture, the value of a religion is very important and because of that Sulh put it as the foundation and any resolution must not go aginst the religion. The second difference is the cocus. In mediation, every negotiation must involve both parties in the same forum with the assumption that all informations were given voluntarily, honest, and both parties must be transparent. A one party negotiation is not encourage.

In sulh, cocus is encouraged because it can bring more information to the Sulh Officer to understand the conflict situation. It helped the Sulh Officer to assist both parties to proposed alternative resolutions. This method is very helpful in the Malay culture because eventhough both parties had some differences and had live separately, they still respect each other and both parties will not simply say anything that can hurt the feeling of the other party. Thus to get more information in a free way, separate negotition is needed. It is very clear that Sulh has its own characteristics which do not exist in the western mediation.

These special characteristics are very much suitable to the Malays whom are still practicing Islam in their daily lives. Resolution that depends on Islamic teaching are viewed as the most perfect and final ways because nobody in Islam can deny the truth of Islamic tecahing that rooted to the Qur’an and the teching of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). Research Implication From the study conducted, it shows that the respondents were able to handle conflict and their abilities were much related to their experience and knowledge shared with their collegues and their superiors in the judicial system.

It also proved that adults are willing to learn especially on what they usually practice in daily lives, as mentioned in the adult learning theory, is true. Knowledge will grow and developed through sharing of informations whether it is done through propper planning or otherwise. Knowledge can be transferred through information sharing directly or indirectly. This is a process of development in adult education and will continue to grow as long as there is room for information sharing.

Sulh Officer will continue to implement the sulh and they will continue to get new knowledge through their experiences and then will share it with their collegues and others. This process will nurture the expension and development of knowledge together with the development of education. From the theoritical perspective, the finding proved and strengthen the adult learning theory that an adult is willing and like to learn what they can practise everyday. It also proved that learning and training process is taken place whiIe someone is doing his or her task everyday as what is proposed by on-the-job training theory.

The research findings also implied that not all western mediation theory is suitable to be implemented in the Malay culture which is closely associated with the religion and eastern culture. Thus sulh approach can be strengthen and a new theory can be introduced which take into consideration the role of sulh and Sulh Officer in resolving conflict to enrich the current theories. In practice, the research findings proved that knowledge is developed and expended through experience and information sharing thus information sharing should be nurtured because it brings new knowledge to others.

This research will contribute to the mediation practice in Islamic world that mediation must not be confined in its own western way. Cocus can be introduced widely and mediators’ role should not be limited to the assistance and guidence to resolve any dispute but it should be expended towards the counseling which include giving advice and reminder to the disputing parties. Based on the ability of sulh in managing conflict, it should be introduced in the early stage of marriege disputes before divorce take place because this will reduce the number of divorce among the Malay couple.

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